I don't sleep particularly much or well any more; it's not really a problem because I remain comfortably alert and functional throughout my days. At night, I toss and turn for a couple of hours, bag maybe five solid hours of sleep, and then get up when the lying-down-too-long pain becomes too much for me. It's a system. Not sure it's a particularly good system, but (and here's the Main Refrain of 2005 again) it's the only system I've got.

Hence with the staying up till 1 talking about the Top Two with Chris and Brandy last night; hence with the Nog n' Snog tonight, hence with Mamo and blogTO and all the endless efforts at just cramming something a bit more active and involving into my life than the usual fields of snowy nothingness. You get to the end of your twenties and begin to realize that because of the person that you are or the kind of lifestyle that you lead, you've sort of diverted around the main vein of what you should have been doing or think you ought to have been feeling. Public Enemy #1 becomes the tag-team of Colossal Boredom / Negative Inertia that you've situated yourself in. And (see Main Refrain above, again) with little else better to do, you realize that you might as well be smashing as many of your icy prisons as you can.

So no, we are not "normal" people for starting a lengthy conversation about our social lives but ending up whinging about movies until the wee hours, but we're the only people we've got. (Refrain.) The trick (for me anyway) is not necessarily finding people of like mind, but finding good complementation, so that there's an ability to reach beyond, to find new throughways and shortcuts into different ways of thinking that might not have been easily visible before. Creative juice. The "muse" theory. Anything that kicks out the chair-legs of your stability and makes you swing, strangling or no, at this point must be better than sitting on the couch staring at the wall (which I've done as recently as 12 hours ago). Bully for the shattered houses.