"...as plate after plate of fluffy poached eggs, cartilaginous peameal, and lakes of sunshiney goo continued to pile up over time, I realized that if I don't start catalogueing these excursions in some formal manner, a great field of human knowledge would be lost. Hence, the Benedict Chronicles..."

I had a dream on the weekend where all the eggs benedicts I've reviewed over the past few months were being served to me in succession and I was being forced to eat them all. Naturally, I woke up and drove me and Bex to the Tulip to have the greasiest eggs benedict available in the Western hemisphere.

You want grease? This is grease. If grease relieves your hangovers, then the Tulip's benedict is the holy fucking grail. If, on the other hand, grease causes migraines for you, then this dish will actually kill you. It's impossible to get this much grease on a benny without actually soaking it in the fryer for ten or fifteen minutes, which they might very well have done in this case. My benny was so soggy it came apart like fall-off-the-bone ribs. Mmmm grease.

Sometimes, that's exactly what you want. Other times, it reeks of excess. This instance was square in the middle of those two situations. In fact what I ended up enjoying more than the eggs themselves were the greasy greasy has browns. Boy howdy were those all right. Served for $7.95 and armed with a cup of coffee and a glass of water, the Tulip's benedict was a pretty solid start to a Saturday morning in Toronto. Eggs were well cooked and the hollandaise was decent if a bit pale. The goo factor in the english muffin and the peameal was a bit gross, but again, you get what you go in for, and I went in for grease. Three eggs out of four!

The Tulip is located at 1610 Queen St. East, near Coxwell, in Toronto. The Benedict Chronicles is an ongoing, non-regular series.