I don’t think I’ve enjoyed collecting this much in over a decade. I may honestly have taken it a bit too far; new job, new outlook on life, living high on the hog and buying every goddamn thing I set my eyes on. I cancelled a few pre-orders; re-sold a few things that showed up after I’d changed my mind; and still ended up with so much new crap that I can’t even keep it all on the shelves at one time. That’s… a problem. But next year’s problem.
1. Jyn Erso: Deluxe Version (Hot Toys)
After falling completely in love with the item that ended up as #2 on this list (see below), I genuinely started questioning whether I even wanted this Jyn any more at all… after all (see above), there is actually a ceiling on how far I can take the sixth-scale market before I’ve just gone bananas. But there is no denying that this is one hell of a figure, and I was completely obsessed with it from the moment it came out of the box. It’s certainly Hot Toys at the absolute top of its game — even the box is a work of fucking art; I have it in one of my drawers as a repository for bips and bobs — and more even than that, it’s a proof-of-concept piece for just how incredible the production design on Rogue One actually was. The word that kept going through my mind as I was working with this figure was “iconography.” (I got into it a bit here.) If I was Gareth Edwards, and I had just this figure to commemorate my time in the Star Wars universe, I’d still be proud as fuck of myself. This thing is Star Wars.
2. Rey of Jakku: Forces of Destiny (Hasbro)
Oooooooooh, so close. And even if Rey here didn’t knock Jyn out of the top spot, for a $30 Hasbro doll to come within striking distance of displacing a Hot Toy on this list should show just what a monumental achievement Hasbro’s Forces of Destiny play actually was. I love these things so much I bought them for other peoples’ children. There is something a bit facile in an actual Barbie-style doll line for girls within the Star Wars universe… but there’s also something sort of ennobling in not making girls play with a 40-year-old toy line that was, by any yardstick, originally designed for boys. This figure line feels right in the wheelhouse of Disney’s overall conversion of Star Wars into the most inclusive franchise on the planet.
3. Japanese Threepster & Beebster (S.H. Figuarts)
Ok, so my whole experience at Kiddy Land in Tokyo was an overwhelming slice of fanboy joy that I’ll probably carry for the rest of my life; and ok, Figuarts’ 7″-scale C-3PO (with red arm) and BB-8 (with “thumbs-up” lighter — the first of his kind) aren’t even necessarily my favourite souvenirs from Japan. But good effing lord, I love them. I love them so much that they’re the lonely exceptions to one of my signature Star Wars collecting rules: the 6-7″ scale range is stooooopid.
4. Cosbaby Rey and BB-8 (Hot Toys)
Off the single-point example of my Doctor Strange cosbaby last year I sort of fell ass-backwards into these things in 2017 this year… arguably too ass-backwards, cuz suddenly I had hundreds of ’em. But… cute lil’ Rey with her cute lil’ stuffed X-wing pilot and helmet! I don’t much like any of the super-deformed takes on BB-8 but I’ll suffer through in this case.
5. Prometheus: The Lost Wave (NECA)
I show up for Prometheus a whole lot, and the fact that NECA ended their action figure line before producing a toy of the series’ lead — Elizabeth Shaw — has bugged me for (literally) five years. So it was with no small amount of gobsmacked delight that I discovered they’d be resurrecting the final wave in time for Alien Covenant‘s release, and it’s the first time I just flat out bought the whole wave. Ironically, Vickers ended up being my favourite — Charlize Theron with a flamethrower is exactly my kind of desk decoration — but Shaw and (alienified) Fifield are both fairly wonderful too.
6. Pythona (Hasbro)
For old times’ sake, a G.I. Joe figure on my top ten list. That hasn’t happened since………. 1987? And it’s a bit of a cheat here, since Pythona was last year’s SDCC exclusive; but screw it, I only bought her this spring, and she’s great. You have to understand, when I was a kid, female action figures in G.I. Joe and elsewhere were so few and far between that I genuinely looked at the #WheresRey campaign with a condescending chuckle. You kids! You have no idea! This newfangled Pythona hits all of my bases being a) a Joe figure; b) a pretty decent one with a slick paint job and a great accessory; and c) SHE’S FUCKING COBRA-LA. Cobra-La is like The Phantom Menace of G.I. Joe offshoots so naturally I love it like sugar candy. Awesome!
7. Evil BB-8 (Sphero)
Showing up just in time to show just what an outdated, gen-1 piece of crap my original BB-8 actually is, BB-9E is the very definition of “thing I should not have bought,” since there is literally no difference between it and the one I already have, except that it’s black, from the new movie, and it has lights in the head. And that was enough. (It’s also a noticeably smoother ride, with sturdier construction, and the head falls off way less.)
8. Cosbaby Hulk, Thor, and Valkyrie (Hot Toys)
It’s hard to drill down through all the ridiculous quantities of Thor: Ragnarok collectibles I bought, which included an entire damn case of Funko mystery figures… but these Cosbabies are pretty terrific. Tessa Thompson’s Valkyrie is also sorely underrepresented in just about every format, so it was dandy to get a solid rendering of her here (with those big pretty eyes!) before the cleaning staff at work judiciously broke her sword in half, because they are the minions of Hela herself.
9. Rock Candy Thor
I tried Lady Thor on in a lot of different sizes this year but I have to admit the one that stuck with me is the one I got first, and is also my first Funko Rock Candy figure, and likely my last. It’s just so gall-darned cute.
10. Every Goddamn Thing In Hasbro’s 3 3/4″ The Last Jedi Line
Look, they cranked it this year. Even the low-articulation figures don’t bother me any more. This is a massive step up from The Force Awakens.
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